Monday, September 12, 2011

Redefining Weird


Rule 1 in blogging:  Don’t blog about blogging or write like you have an audience.  Well, I’m breaking the rules as usual mostly because I’ve gone MIA in blog world for more than just the normal sabbatical.  Excuses are endless, and the truth be told, I have A LOT of them for not blogging.  I didn’t blog during our last tip to Ethiopia because the Internet was down at the guesthouse most of the time.  I didn’t blog when we returned because I was on re-entry overload.  After re-acclimating, I didn’t blog because I was processing emotions and information.  Processing complete, I found myself n the midst of a new and unintended path.  I didn’t post about this new path because, frankly, I just didn’t know how to discuss where HE was leading this family.

Months ago, we announced we rejoined the ranks of families adopting from Ethiopia.  We officially sent over our dossier and completed EVERY piece of paperwork that our agency needs.  Yes, the program has changed.  Yes, there seem to be more hurdles to clear this round, but we are in! 

Until our last trip to Ethiopia, we didn’t realize the direction our next adoption would take.  On paper, we’d prepared ourselves for a child with special needs like HIV, Hepatitis, and clubfoot or cleft lip.  We’d committed to a child between the ages of 2 and 8 years old.  Surely, God would fit that child into our home.  Truth is, we are compelled to loving the least of these in the world’s eyes.  Being committed to this seemed to blind us from where He wanted to take us.

God changed the path the last Saturday we spent in Ethiopia.  (This tends to be His way in our lives.)  I’m not sure why I continue to be amazed by this; but I am.  In a miraculous, God-scripted-manner, God set our path toward the adoption of 3 (yes I said 3) siblings.  (Pause.  Breathe in.  Exhale.  Repeat.)  Putting this in print terrifies me to the core.  No HIV.  No Hep.  No medical needs…just lots of children.  For those of you mathematicians, yes, that does make the kid count in our home at an all time high of 7.  Whew…said it.  Way in if you’d like; but be gentle, please.

Our family prays ceaselessly for God to script this road for His glory alone.  Each of us is scared yet sure. The moment the Spirit makes a depository of peace into our hearts, the words “college funds”, “weird”, “mega family”, and “passenger van” pop up and slay the faith we have in his plan.  I feel like I teeter-totter back and forth from faith to fear and back again.  I can only see God responding to me as I do with my sweet daughter when she grieves the “weird” of our lives.  “Weird” by the world’s standard, is what I am called to.  Not conformity.  Not ease.  Nor normalcy.  I remind her Jesus was in every way “weird”.  Paul- weird.  Noah- weird.  Abraham- weird.  Purity, eternal mindset, righteousness with out judgment, and sacrifice are peculiar by the world’s definition.  It’s just making peace with the fear of judgment by the world and accepting the isolation that comes from our differences.  If I can tell her, why can’t I take it in?  In the end, I resolve.  I am far more fearful of disobedience than “weird”. 

When we adopted Mez, we found ourselves catching our breath at each turn if anxiety, in desperation, fully consumed.  This time around, we can best describe the journey like the lazy river… We have settled in and feel like God is moving us around each bend.  At certain bends the aversion to the road less taken forebodes; but it’s different.  We don’t have a lot of control, but it feels good. 

Join us in praying for God’s will for our family and for the terrific trio that is still in Ethiopia.  Pray that he will open and close the appropriate doors.  Pray for us to abide in whatever “Weird” He calls us to live.  We are praying for your weird and willingness to walk there, too. 

6 comments:

  1. Wow Wow Wow! That's a lot to take in & digest isn't it? Excited for you guys!!!

    And remember...it's no fun to be 'normal'!!

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  2. SO excited for you all!! I read your post out loud to the family and we rejoiced in the excitement of it all and prayed for all of you as well, especially for the continued peace that passes understanding as you bravely, and joyfully, obey God's call for you to be "weird". The girls now want us to pursue adopting three more kids instead of fostering, they think it sounds grand. I miss talking to you my friend, let's organize a time to skype. Hugs and love and prayers from all of us - so glad you updated. xoxo

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  3. I found your blog on a friend's blog roll, and I just wanted to say congratulations! That is so exciting...although your blog may need a name change now. "Waiting for Several More Knights" ??? ;-) We are quickly joining the ranks of the "weird" too. Praying your crew gets home quickly and safely.

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  4. THRILLED!!!

    You MUST blog more so I can follow this amazing, God-breathed journey!!!!

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  5. How exciting! Our family is on a similar journey. We were prepared for one thing, but God had something else in mind. I keep telling God it's crazy! I know so well when you say you teeter-totter from faith to fear. In the end I know it's all for His glory!

    I can't wait to see the rest of your journey unfold. Thanks for your honesty in writing!

    We are waiting for a critical piece of paperwork before I even attempt to blog about it/announce it...

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  6. @Dawn- Could you? And do it here I might add.
    @Christie- Yes, a name change may be as overdue as a blog makeover.
    @Gayla- Sweet, sweet Gayla...I need a you in my corner! What an encourager.
    @Lisa- I can't wait to hear!

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