Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Atheist, Eucharist, and Ebenezer

“Am I always the atheist in Arms, me the believer who doesn’t believe?” Ann Voskamp questions.  Whew, can I relate to that thought!  The quiet of the phone lines (still NO word) regarding our adoption takes me back to my natural habitat, my natural posture, and my default system…anxiety.  Please, don’t mistake me.  I pray.  I remember His mighty acts.  I trust.  I even speak it aloud; but while in my mind and daily practice I recall all God has done to bring us to our children in Ethiopia, all the confirmations, all the hurdles removed, still HERE and NOW I wake with aching jaws from clinching teeth through another night of “not knowing”, my back and shoulders boast the signs of stress related stiffness, and my brow’s constant furrow proves my practical belief wanes.  Ugh, why must I, subconsciously, choose worry?  It is a fruitless action.   I am aware it’s only a sign that my belief is laced with doubts of Him.  SO…we are taking up a daily practice of offsetting perturbation with joy and thanks.  As we wait for word on our adoption, we choose to embrace these moments like manna from the Old Testament.  Manna, his provision and opportunity to give thanks.  We know thanksgiving will allow our gratitude to feed our trust in HIM. 

Today, I am thankful that HE has given us another opportunity to exercise intentional gratitude as the proof that HE is a trustworthy God, who will complete what HE began.  Scratch the believer who doesn’t believe.  Exit atheist in His arm.  Enter eucharisteo.  Feel free to leave your thanksgiving here as an Ebenezer of His faithfulness (I Samuel).  


  1. My Ebenezer:
    He has built a personal Hebrews 11...the Hall of Faith for my very life. I look. I see. I remember and recall when desperate and longing, questioning and wondering, scared and filled with fears of tomorrow. Then He arrived and the piers of faith were driven deeper and He quited my heart. Yes tears still flowed and questions were unanswered but I knew full well He would feed me, He would find a way in the desert.HE became louder, deeper, greater and more profound than all the darkness that threatened the foundations built on Him. He, the problem solver was on the rise and my place was to allow Him and only Him to put life in order. HE DID. HE WILL CONTINUE TO DO SO. Why? Becuase He is faithful and loves to create beauty out of brokeness!
    I woke and one day and I was seated on a high place. He gave me a new name with a new beginning and surrounded me with promise of abundant life...
    So I say an Ebenezer of thanksgiving is YOU, Josh, Hunter, Ann-Elizabeth, Preston/Tiger, Mez.

    1. Kisses, Marcia Garrett. We love you and are grateful for His provisions for you.